


Mr. D's Daycare Service

by SearchingForMercury



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan
Genre: Daycare, F/M, Fish Tanks, Mr. D's POV, little kids, tributes to Hades
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-26
Updated: 2013-12-26
Packaged: 2018-01-06 06:43:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1103684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SearchingForMercury/pseuds/SearchingForMercury
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mr. D is cursed to take care of brats -- little demigod children. These just happen to be a little younger than what he is used to.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mr. D's Daycare Service

**Author's Note:**

> This is my submission for the Percy Jackson Secret Santa event, for K. 
> 
> The prompt was "the seven as little kids (any or all of the them)" with the second wish being "Percy just being adorable," so I hope I fulfilled both of these~ 
> 
> I also hope you enjoy it :)

He didn't hear it yet, but he knew he would. The chit-chat, the whining, the squeak of tiny, dirty sneakers against linoleum floors. Adults pulling on little hands, wiping up the mess they made. It was a disgusting job and he wasn't sure why he had to be the one to look after the runts while their parents were away. Daycare was an appropriate title, sure, but Daytime Hell would have been a more apt name, if those books about Christianity were honest. He'd have named the institution _Spooky Styx_ , but then he wouldn't have been able to decorate the sign outside with real grapevines.

Oh sure, the parents all knew he was Dionysus -- there was no avoiding that, with the children they brought to him. Why they thought it wise to leave innocent minds with the Lord of Wine and Revelry? Why they trusted he wouldn't give them something a little stronger than grape juice in their sippy cups? How could he possibly keep a bunch of brats in line when that went against his very nature? Because his dad was a hypocritical ass and made him.

Mr. D was just putting in his last words in a text to Ariadne when he heard it -- a car pulling in up front. His fingers were a little too fat for all the teeny, flat buttons, but he managed to hit send before he heard the car door slam. Hefting himself out of his chair, he mosied on over to the vending machine out in the hallway, the one under the stairs. The daycare was set in a school, the room set off to the side like it had grown there and just attached itself to the building. Who knew, maybe that's what happened. It had its own entrance, too, but one could reach it by going through the school. He never bothered telling parents that part, though. 

The crinkled bill wouldn't take at first and he tried rubbing it flat with the edge of the machine. If it took drachmas, he wouldn't have this problem. It took after about the third try and the gears inside whizzed as it spat a Diet Coke into the tray at the bottom. If it exploded on him again, the first thing he'd do when the punishment lifted would be to spike every Coca Cola brand in the world. The hallways were all dark and dingy, as if the janitor who worked there never really made a difference. School wouldn't start for another two hours. Why was he the one that had to come in early?

It didn't spew sticky sweet soda all over him, thank goodness. He took a couple pills from his pocket and swallowed them with a sip -- he didn't want anything to make this headache worse. That's what he called it, anyways -- a headache. He was more than a little aware of what the after effects of excessive drinking were. He just never really had to experience it himself, before. Thank you, daddy dearest.

A woman was waiting in the room, her hair tucked into a ponytail as if she'd been in a rush to leave. Her hand was placed on the little boy's head, anchoring him to the spot. The boy wriggled sometimes, already eying what he was always obsessed with across the room. Every day Mr. D had to wipe the smudged fingerprints off the aquarium. And of course, the boy was decked out in blue. He seriously doubted the kid dressed himself. He took another sip.

"I'll be here by five," she said, though he wasn't sure who she was talking to at that point. Probably him. Right. "I'll see you later, then, sweetheart." Or the boy. He didn't really care. A paper bag was pushed into the boy's arms and a kiss pressed into his dark hair. As soon as she had gone out the door and he watched the car drive off, the boy had attached himself to the fish tank. 

"If you keep doing that, you'll scare the fish dead," Mr. D commented.

"No I won't," he replied.

"I cleaned that thing last night, you know," he said, taking a bigger swig of his drink. "Put your lunch in your hole in the wall, Perry, unless you plan on poisoning Mr. Goldie."

"It's Percy," the boy replied, giving him a nasty look on his way to the cubby holes. "And I changed my mind, I don't like the name Goldie. How about Goldeen?"

"That's copyright infringement."

Percy frowned. "It's Pokemon!" he argued.

"Your point?" Mr. D replied. As every day, it was going to be a long one. He could feel it in his limbs. 

The next to arrive at exactly eight o'clock was another of the annoying sorts, but somewhat more tolerable, he guessed. Her blonde hair was done up in pigtails, her plastic Scooby Doo lunch box at her side. She got the most gold stars in the class and was real proud of the fact, though Mr. D didn't bother telling her he gave them out almost randomly and that by the end of the semester, he'd have completed a mural of the one and only Pac-Man. 

"Are you still looking at the fish?" she asked. "There are only three in there."

"Mr. D said we might get another one," Percy replied.

Dionysus swallowed the wrong way and started coughing. Annabeth threw him a half-concerned expression before returning to her conversation. Gee, thanks.

"I don't think he was being serious," she said, staring at the fish tank too. The goldfish was swimming about in a lazy way and it wasn't the first time Dionysus had wanted to trade places with it. "He's almost never serious." Her tone became hushed, almost conspiratorial, but he could still hear them. "I don't think he likes you very much."

"Duh," Percy replied, rolling his eyes. "I think anyone with the brain of this fish and one eyeball could know that."

Her grey eyes narrowed and Dionysus perked up at the idea of a fight breaking out, but she just walked away, towards the bookshelf. When nine o'clock would roll around, he knew she'd be asking to go to the school's library as she'd read all the books there already. As it were, she took a book about a lost cat and snuggled down in a bean bag chair. 

After that, the other kids started rolling in one after the other. There was Grover, the weird kid who liked to put almost everything in his mouth, Jason and Leo, the two who were responsible for every outlet being child-proofed, Piper, Hazel, and Frank, the three most tolerable, and then odd little Nico, who didn't say much or play with the others, but he gave off the most peculiar feeling.

Once they had all set out to play with their usual things, Mr. D pulled out his color gameboy. It was purple, of course, and he didn't have to play color games on it, that was the cool part. He could play the older games if he wanted. Which he did. Pac-Man was best when it was older. The newer games had him 3D and talking and that was just creepy.

His phone buzzed once or twice and he'd hit pause to answer the texts. Sometimes it was just a picture, like of a flower or people Ariadne thought were being funny. He would respond with dramatic renditions of what was going on with the children, like Piper's thrilling Barbie plot twists or the way Leo had made nearly every single toy car in the room drive around with the television remote.

Jason had been playing with Leo, his blonde head bent over the cars along with Leo's dark curls -- Dionysus sent pictures, though he wasn't sure if that was legal or not. But then he must have done something Leo didn't like, for he was now sitting with Piper holding a Ken doll and fiddling with the tuxedo on it. 

"Do you just want to be the dog?" Piper asked Jason. Her tales and plans for the Barbie dolls were too complicated for the boy to keep up or contribute to. His imagination must have dried up too soon, for he had started off with more than just the Ken doll.

"But that's boring!" the boy protested. He looked down at his doll. 

Piper sighed and shook her head. Mr. D couldn't even begin to guess at what her stories were for the dolls, but he had the feeling they wouldn't involve Jason's much.

"I still can't find it," Percy complained. He had accompanied Annabeth to the library this time, coming back to the room clutching several large books about fish. The two were sprawled out on the floor in front of the fish tank, books spread out with their shiny, colored pages depicting sea life.

Annabeth was reading her own set. She had graduated from picture books to ones with chapters and slightly more words. "Of course not, that's a book for fish in the ocean. I told you that in the library," she said.

"You never know!" he replied. Mr. D glanced up to see the boy frowning at the pages. "This one has a sucker on its face too!"

"Okay, whatever," Annabeth said in a huff and her eyes widened in an almost comical way. 

Mr. D knew what fish they were talking about, but he thought it was funnier to see the boy search for the fish every day. One day, maybe, he'd find it. He wouldn't be able to say the name, though, and maybe that would be funnier. Dionysus was prepared to wait for it, though.

The daycare had a wooden house inside, miniature sized for the brats. He wasn't sure what this was supposed to be for -- to play like a married couple? Who thought that was actually _fun_? And for _kids_? They had a whole lot of growing up to do before they could really appreciate what marriage was like. Regardless, Frank had climbed his way to the top with nearly every single stuffed animal that had been laying about. Hazel was with him, and they were either reenacting a very significant time for the dinosaurs or sleeping. Dionysus had a hard time seeing them.

Nico was a weird little kid and Mr. D would send Ariadne texts like "this kid tho" and various emoticons to express the level of discomfort he felt. Nico would often sit by himself, content with whatever happened to be around him, and sometimes stare at the others as if he wanted to join. Mr. D had broached this topic only once, at Ariadne's bidding, and had received only a solemn stare from the child.

Grover, who had been building things with blocks -- cities maybe? -- got bored and sauntered over to where Percy and Annabeth were sitting, joining Percy in his hunt for the mysterious fish. Mr. D kept an eye on him though. The boy had a tendency to tear out pages and make ammunition for his spitball tournaments at lunch.

"Can I play too?" Leo asked Piper, one of the cars snuggled in his arms.

Her expression turned sour and she looked him up and down. He looked eager, excited, and if Mr. D didn't know him better, he wouldn't have understood Piper's wary attitude. "Last time you took her head off," she said.

"Because she talked!" Leo explained, his own face settling down into a pout. "I just wanted to know how."

"You took off her _head_ ," Piper repeated.

"I promise I won't do it again," Leo offered.

Jason perked up at the idea of another boy joining in. Perhaps he was thinking he would have more to do.

"Okay, you can have the dog."

He was wrong.

When lunchtime rolled around, Dionysus gathered them outside to eat -- it usually meant less to clean up. They all managed to fit on one picnic bench, Mr. D included. To Percy's dismay, everyone took a seat before him, which meant that he had to sit next to the teacher. Dionysus could have chuckled at the boy's expression when he climbed up on the bench. With them all crowded together, it almost felt cozy. It was the closest he really ever got to the kids. Not that he actually _wanted_ to be close to them. They sneezed with their mouths open a little too often for his taste.

"Is that mold on your bread, Peter?" Dionysus asked.

Percy's shoulders scrunched up, like he either wanted to make himself smaller or contain his rage. It was probably the latter. "It's Percy and _no_ , it's just blue," he said and took a large bite to prove his point.

Mr. D knew that, of course. The kid's lunch almost always contained everything one could possibly dye blue. He often wondered if there were health concerns for this kid in the future. The chocolate chip cookies looked more turquoise, though, and when he said so, Percy just gave him one of those _you have got to be shitting me_ faces. It was remarkable how expressive these kids were.

As soon as they were finished eating, without incident for once, they all got up to play again. Dionysus didn't even have to tell them, that was nice. Hazel went for the sandbox, Piper for the swings, Jason and Leo went to play pirates with Percy, Annabeth brought a book with her, Frank was feeding some birds, and Grover...Grover was digging around in the bushes. Dionysus really didn't care to find out why.

A dark figure in the corner of his eye had him a little bothered, but he just figured it was Nico being his weird self. 

Every so often, Hazel would let out a delighted cry, but Dionysus didn't have to look up to know what had happened. Every day she found gems and sparkly rocks in the sandbox. He didn't bother wondering why, it was pretty much obvious to anyone who knew her father. She donated her findings to the pirate party, letting them use it as treasure. If only they knew what they were playing with and how close to actual treasure it was. That was another text message to Ariadne. 

Nico was still standing off to the side, his head bent as if he were either looking down at something or he was just incredibly depressed. Dionysus wouldn't be surprised with either option. But the kid was a little too far out and if he somehow disappeared off the property, then he'd be in a lot of trouble. Not only from Nico's parents, but from his own as well. Zeus had given him this responsibility as punishment. If he fucked up, he didn't want to know what else daddy darling could dish out.

So with a great big sigh, Mr. D went to see what was wrong with him.

Nico was staring down at a dead bird. It must have died recently, for there were no signs of decomposition or gnawing. 

"You should leave that alone," Mr. D commented. "It could be sick."

"It's not," Nico said with a tone that was almost eerily confident. Like he just _knew_. And maybe he did. 

"Well, it's not going to do anything, no matter how long you look at it," he said, shifting his weight to one side. At least the weather had cleared up a little. It had been a little cloudy that morning, a definite nip in the air.

"Can we bury it?" the boy asked, finally breaking eye contact with the bird to look up at Dionysus. The new eye contact was a little weird. "Please?"

"Uh," Mr. D said. "I don't have a, uh, box or, or anything. I think."

"Please?"

He frowned. "I'll go look," he said. "Do you want me to get the others?" If they were going to have a funeral for a dead bird, might as well make everyone else suffer.

"No," Nico replied, looking back down at the bird. "Not them."

Mr. D nodded, feeling himself sigh on the inside. "Okay. Alright. I'll be right back."

The others were still playing pirates -- loudly, at that. Dionysus managed to gather a few things in a plastic bucket and get back outside without any of them getting injured, going missing, or doing anything dumb. Nico hadn't moved.

"Is a granola box okay?" he asked. The packets would roll loose in his desk drawers until he wound up eating them all. That might actually take a while.

Nico nodded, looking at the contents of the bucket. "What's the other stuff for?" he asked.

"You'll see," Dionysus said and got to work digging a shallow grave. He nudged the dead bird into the box, set it in the hole, threw in a few coins, and buried the thing. Nico was silent for the entire process. "Here is where we just sort of hope it gets to the underworld alright. But I'll put in a good word with old Mr. H, how's that?"

Nico just nodded. Alright then.

Dionysus proceeded to pop open a carton of two-percent milk, pouring out its contents. The ground absorbed it all, making the patch of earth into mud. Honey came after that. Then he pulled out the last item from the bucket. "Normally you're supposed to offer blood to these sort of things, but I don't think they ever meant _my_ blood and I'm not technically supposed to harm you kids, so here's the next best thing. It's red, anyways."

Nico's eyebrows drew together and he looked up at Mr. D. "A twirly straw?" he asked.

Dionysus nodded and stuck it into the ground. "If that doesn't disappear, then at least we have a grave marker, right?" he asked.

The boy looked like he understood a little better. Dionysus shifted his weight to the other foot. He wasn't sure if it was degrading or not, making something like an offering to a fellow god, but he was already pretty far down that hole anyways. Having to watch these kids and make sure they don't get into trouble was not what he would call an enlightening job.

Soon after the funeral, Dionysus was ushering in the energy drained kids, ready for his favorite part of the day: nap time. They went around pulling out the mats and blankets, setting them up around whoever they liked most. It was usually in sets of threes or twos, with Nico being the odd one out, as usual. Those who couldn't sleep would whisper to each other until they could. Eventually they all conked out and Dionysus settled down in his chair once again for another round of Pac-Man.

The door creaked open and a dark-haired head popped in. It was the fifth grade history teacher, more famously known as Mr. H by the kids. His long fingers curled around the door as his eyes surveyed the sleeping children. 

Dionysus nodded at him, the man who was technically his uncle. Mr. D had gathered up Hazel's findings from the day into a little pouch before they went inside, which he then handed over to Hades. The man took it without a word and, instead of leaving right away, paused and turned towards the window. He stared out at the yard for maybe a minute before turning back to Dionysus with an eyebrow arched. Dionysus shrugged and Hades sort of nodded, then left the room.

He often did that -- just walked in and took what Hazel discovered. Dionysus had the feeling it was to avoid making Hazel's mom worry about her daughter or to protect the girl from when she wasn't at the daycare. Sometimes he would pat her head or Nico's before leaving, but often he would just do what he came there for and nothing else.

Parents began returning for their children after nap time. It was the time of day when their kids were most docile, no wonder they picked that particular time slot. First was Frank and a few of his relatives. They thanked Mr. D for everything and left, telling Frank to stand up a little straighter on their way out the door. Nico and Grover were next, picked up by very similar people. They didn't look the same, no, but they gave off a very particular vibe. Then came Piper's in a very shiny car, Jason, Leo, and then Hazel. When Annabeth left, it was just Mr. D and Percy.

"When did your mom say she was coming?" Dionysus asked, leaning back in his chair until it creaked.

"Five," he said, holding up his hand to display the number. 

He nodded and glanced at the clock. It was a few minutes after. Ariadne would be coming to fetch him in less than an hour. He cracked open another Diet Coke, one he got when they were sleeping. He paused when bringing it up to his mouth and, instead, took out two little cups from his desk. He offered one bubbly cup to Percy.

"Thank you," he boy said, surprised. 

Normally he wouldn't give the kids liquid sugar, but the day was almost over. The lights were on, the sun outside steadily growing dim. The students from the school building had long gone and, as soon as Hades was finished grading papers, he would also find his way to the daycare room. Persephone and Ariadne found they enjoyed each other's company, though Dionysus wasn't sure if that was a good or bad thing yet. Maybe a mix of both. Ariadne's texts had stopped coming in, signaling to him that she was on her way.

"One day I'm going to find out what that fish is," Percy said all of a sudden, his tone strangely solemn. His gaze was fixed to the window, to where his mom's car would eventually roll up. "I know a lot of fish already. Mostly fish in the ocean. They live in salt water, did you know that?"

"Really?" Mr. D said, almost sarcastic.

Percy didn't respond right away, making him feel a bit guilty for his tone. "Yeah, but salt water tastes gross, I don't know why they like it," he continued. "My mom is going to take me to see the ocean this weekend."

Mr. D made a 'mmm' noise, to show that he was listening. 

"We were supposed to go last weekend, but my mom was busy," Percy said. "With work, she said. So we're going this weekend. Do you think I'll get to see a lot of fish?" He took a long drink from his cup. 

"Maybe," Mr. D replied. "You'd see more in an aquarium. Unless you plan on swimming in the water."

Percy let out a shudder from his thoughts. "But the water would be so cold," he said and there was another pause as he took another sip. "What's an aquarium?"

Mr. D yawned. "It's like the fish tank, only bigger. You get to see fish from all over the world, probably," he said.

" _Really_?" Percy asked and if this were a cartoon, Mr. D would say his eyes would be all shiny or sparkly with excitement, for he had whipped his head around to look up at him. 

"Yeah," Dionysus replied. "Fish tanks as big as this room, glass as wide as these walls. And all lit up just so you can see them. I'm sure you've seen them in your books."

"Hmm," Percy said, thinking. No doubt he was trying to remember if he had seen anything that fit the description.

At that time, however, his mother's car finally rolled up. It was a little more than twenty minutes after five and the woman ran inside looking frazzled. Percy ran to the door.

"I'm so sorry!" she said, scooping him up. "I got out of work late and I thought it wouldn't happen again."

Mr. D shrugged and picked up the can of soda. 

"Hey mom, can we go to the aquarium?" the boy asked, sounding the word out. 

"The aquarium? I thought you wanted to go to the ocean," she said.

"Yeah, but next time. Next time we need to go to the aquarium," he said, resting his cheek against her shoulder. The sugary drink had yet to kick in, it seemed.

"We'll see," she said. The ever classic line parents said to their children. It was neither a promise nor a refusal. Just a vague idea that may or may not turn out to be a reality. "Thank you so much for watching him today," she said to Dionysus. "We'll see you again tomorrow."

He nodded to her and sipped at the can. "Yeah, see you later. Bye, Percy," he said with a three fingered wave from the hand around the soda. 

The boy's face lit up momentarily, half from surprise and half from glee. "Yeah, bye," he said.

Dionysus leaned against the desk as he watched their car drive away. Well then. Another half hour and his phone buzzed, signaling Ariadne's arrival. So he pushed himself to his feet, prepared to join her in cleaning the place up for the next day's adventures.


End file.
